Question 1

Do I really need counseling? (If others are saying something or you are asking.)

Accepted Answer

This is a question that many ponder before engaging with therapy. Here are a couple of ways you might know it is time to get therapy:

• Something that you have tried to change for some time continues not to change or improve
 • People around you, that love you, are suggesting getting some outside help
 • You start to notice negatives shifts in your life and situations continuing to get worse
 • There are some past memories that you don't feel you can let go of
 • Your spouse is asking you to go
 • Your marriage feels stuck
 • You are feeling like your marriage has become a roommate situation
 • You keep losing your temper
 • You continue to feel overwhelmed, anxious or worried
 • You are using substances to feel better or handle situations
 • You find yourself wanting to distance from relationships around you
 • You find yourself being constantly fearful of relationships around you changing or ending

Question 2

What does the first session look like?

Accepted Answer

In the first session it is a time for the therapist to get to know you better and for you to see if you are comfortable with the therapist. We do not believe that everyone has the same story and therefore, you will not receive a cookie cutter treatment. We believe that everyone is unique with their own journey, has their own goals and vision for their lives. We aim to get to know you at a level where we can help you reach those goals and develop a plan that suites your individual needs. During our first session we will ask a series of questions. Towards the end we will present a pathway in order to collaborate on how to best move forward and accomplish your goals of growth and/or healing.

Question 3

How long does counseling usually take? (We will cover real healing vs symptom reduction.)

Accepted Answer

The length of your counseling journey depends on the individual and what you are coming in for.   At Brett Ryan Counseling our goal is not to just help you with symptom reduction.  With healing and health, we must find and address the core issues and do the hard work. Anyone can experience symptom reduction, however, that is a temporary solution if the main issues aren’t addressed, problems can resurface. We want to encourage you, if you are going to spend time and money, make sure you only have to do it once instead of always having to go back so you can reduce symptoms.

Question 4

Why don't you take insurance?

Accepted Answer

We do not for several reason: First, often insurance companies pressure therapists to make a quick diagnosis (that stays on your record) without being able to properly assess the individual or couple. Secondly, insurance companies are primarily worried about symptom reduction and not healing, for us this is an ethical issue as we truly care for our clients and want to you find healing.

We can offer you a Super Bill in order to get reimbursed by your insurance company. This is a document that lets your insurance company know you came to see us, how much you paid, when we met, and what your diagnosis is. Sometimes insurance companies will reimburse and sometimes they don't because of the plan you have with them, or the diagnosis you are given.

We want to encourage you to ask the question, what is your health and enjoyment of relationships and life worth? Sometimes it is worth it to invest in yourself so that you can have better outcomes in life.

Question 5

We need marriage counseling but my spouse refuses to come, what do I do?

Accepted Answer

This is a difficult situation to be in. It’s difficult to want to work on your marriage and repair but your partner might be unwilling. First, we encourage you not to try to force them, therapy has to be willingly engaged in order to be effective. Second, realize that you can only control yourself and you are only responsible for your own decisions.  Third and final, start coming in, make it a priority to work on yourself.  Help your health increase and often the way you engage in your marriage increase in healthy ways. Sometimes this is the best way for a spouse to desire to come to therapy, seeing their spouse improve and get healthier.

Question 6

Whats your stance on medication?

Accepted Answer

First, if you haven’t started taking medication: We believe that if you don't have to take medication… then don’t. There are risks that come with medications, and all to often people are quick to turn to them when they don't have to. We encourage you that unless it is necessary (which sometimes it is) try everything you can before starting to take medication.

Second, If you are about to start medication: Please make sure you do your research, look at several things…
 • What are the possible side effects of this medication?
 • Is there any supplements, dietary changes, or lifestyle changes that could give the same result?
 • What are the long term affects of the medications?
 • What are the risks or common struggles people go through when stopping the medication?
 • Finally, if you don’t take the medications what are you risking? This is an important questions because sometimes medications are necessary and should be taken.
Third, if have already started: Know there is nothing wrong with this. Some issues require medication and we shouldn’t feel shame or like we failed. The brain is an organ, that organ operates off of chemical balances and interactions. This is an organ just like the heart and liver. We wouldn't shame someone for having to take heart medication or diabetic medications, it is the same with the brain. If your medication is working for you, it’s not having any serious side effects or risks, it is completely fine to take them or start with them.

Fourth and finally, if you are thinking about stopping the medication: Please do not stop without discussing this with professionals. Some medications if you stop too quickly or abruptly can have many side effects and can sometimes be worse then the presenting issue that you took them for. Make sure you do your research and talk to people. Also, ask the question, why do you want to stop it and what are the risks of stopping?  Often people want to stop medication due to shame or cultural pressure. Please take some time and make sure you make the best decision for your health and safety.

Question 7

Are you just going to ask me “how do I feel?” all the time or agree with me all the time?

Accepted Answer

Absolutely not, you can find some people who will agree with you all the time and ask how you feel for free. That is more of a role for friends than for a therapist. At Brett Ryan Counseling although we are going to ask how you feel, and might agree with you sometimes, you are paying for us to give you honest feedback and to help you come to the best solutions, even if it means challenging you and helping you face difficult decisions.

Question 8

How often should I come to therapy?

Accepted Answer

We usually suggest weekly or bi-weekly to begin with.  Why? The reason is, doing anything less than that really means you are coming in to update us and there is usually not much progress made if it is less than weekly.  Once we gain some momentum in your health improving and things become more manageable for you, we then start the discussion of what it looks like to slow down and eventually conclude therapy.

Frequently Asked Questions